One of three things happens when someone finds out I’m a stay at home mom.
1. They say “Good for you!”
2. They ask questions
3. They say “Uh, I could never do that.”
First off, let me just say that I am not offended by any of these remarks. So, if you are one of the people that has said something to me, no offense taken by any means! I am, however, amused by the remarks at times!
I never envisioned myself as a stay at home mom, nor did I judge those that chose this route. I just didn’t think it was for me. Now that I am a stay at home mom, it is amusing hearing the comments and thinking back to what I once thought.
It is refreshing to hear someone say “good for you”. They have either been there, are there, or wish they were there. These are the people that relate to it, understand it, and are genuinely happy that I am getting to experience it. I am this person, now. I am thrilled when I hear that someone is getting to be a stay at home mom, because I now get it. It is an amazing experience, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
The questions are interesting. They range anywhere from “Aren’t you bored?” to “What do you do all day?” to “Don’t you miss your job (teaching)?”, and even “Why?”.
Am I bored? I don’t have time to be bored! This little girl of mine keeps me on my toes at all times. She is learning every second of the day, requires full time attention, and gets bored easily. So no, I’m not bored. I’m exhausted and would love to have a moment of boredom one day! When she isn’t playing (and soon to be running around), she is eating or sleeping. Eating is a full time job in and of itself. I nurse her, then she eats like the cookie monster when she gets solid foods in front of her. She used to nurse 8 times a day or more. Now that she’s older, she nurses 4 times a day and eats solids 3 times a day. So, just feeding her keeps me plenty busy. During her naps I get things done. I get a chance to pick up the mess we’ve caused during her meals and during play time, perhaps vacuum the dog hair off of the floor and clean a bathroom. I get to shower and get dressed, take care of the dogs, plan meals, cook meals, etc. I write posts on this blog when she naps, and I get a tiny bit of me time.
What do I do all day? See above. I take care of everything that my daughter needs. I teach her things, we go out and experience new things every day, I nurse her, I feed her, I soothe her, I read to her and play with her, I take care of the house, the dogs, the meals, the laundry, etc. My husband helps too, and wants to, but I try and get as much done before he comes home, so he can just spend time with us.
Don’t I miss teaching? Not really. One day I might, and I’m sure one day I’ll teach again. I might not be in a classroom teaching chemistry at the moment, but I’m teaching my little girl about anything and everything, every second of every day. I have to teach her how to be a kind, loving, intelligent, peaceful, reasonable, dedicated, honest, respectful, thoughtful, and focused (and more) individual. I have to teach her so many things. And it is not a “have” to, it is a “get” to! It is a huge responsibility. Much larger of a scope than I ever imagined. I have to know about colors, shapes, why the sky is blue, what every word means, and why everything in the world happens. She will ask, and I will not know all of the answers, but we will learn together. Being a parent means I have to be much more responsible for my knowledge, and that I get to impart that knowledge to her every single day. So no, I don’t miss teaching, because I am teaching more now than I ever have.
Why? Why am I a stay at home mom, you ask? Well, that’s easy. I want to be the one to raise our daughter. I don’t want to pay someone to do something that I can do better than a stranger could. I want to be home so I am here for every special moment. All of her firsts will happen on my watch. She will learn from me, and I love that. She will grow up so fast, and I don’t want to miss it. So I am taking in every moment, and taking care of my family. I have NO judgment for those that choose to not stay home. Maybe you can’t afford it financially, or maybe you simply don’t want to- you enjoy your career. I get it- I once thought I wouldn’t want to. Now that we have a daughter in our lives, my world just changed. My thoughts on staying home changed when we thought seriously about having kids. What an amazing world it is, now!
And those of you that say “uh, I could never do that”… Again, I get it. I mean who wants to feed, play, sleep, diaper change, feed, play, sleep, diaper change, and repeat all day? I get that it doesn’t sound appealing, and I get that it is not for everyone. But it is for me. I get to be a mama. There’s nowhere in the world I’d rather be. I don’t miss me time. I don’t miss date nights. I love going out to eat as a family, and I love that my entire day consists of hanging out with the most amazing baby ever! Just remember that it’s more than feed, play, sleep, diaper change. It’s laughs, cuddles, learning new things, exploring, and so much more.